A letter to my best friend

Darling,

I’m sorry you’re feeling the way you are. I’m sorry that anxiety has become a constant in your life. I’m sorry that you’re so tired and all you want is some sleep. I’m sorry this is all so confusing. I’m sorry life isn’t what it used to be. I’m sorry you feel like your brain is your worst enemy and that you can’t stop thinking. I’m sorry that you feel like your thoughts are scattered and you can’t concentrate. I’m sorry you feel so alone.

I wish I could take the pain and suffering away but believe me when I say that I know what you’re going through. I’ve been where you are; at this very moment when you have no hope left. I’ve been there. You feel like you’re running on empty, sometimes you care and sometimes you don’t. You may feel that you’re alone with your thoughts… and that scares you the most.

But I can promise that you are NOT alone. NO matter what your mind tries to tell you. Someone understands… I understand! I understand when you say you are scared to be alone with your thoughts. I understand when you say you have no idea what is going on. And some days that’s all you need to hear. That someone else has been there! Someone else gets it, and they don’t judge you for being a mess.

I’ll sit with you in complete silence, if that’s what you need. I’ll let you cry on my shoulder, and I’ll probably cry with you. I’ll hug you until you feel that some of the broken pieces of you are put back together. I’ll hold your hand so you can feel that I’m right there with you. I’ll believe in you, until you believe in yourself. I’ll love you until the end of time.

It’s going to be okay.

You’re going to be okay.

Breathe.

Fight.

Be kind to yourself.

With love,

Hilary