A battle against mental illness. One day at a time.
Last week I celebrated my birthday. Since then I have taken the time to look back and reflect at my 27th year. 27 was probably the most challenging year I have ever had. 27...you were a year of hardships, unexpected change, endless questions, and battles for acceptance and inclusion. But because of you I grew,... Continue Reading →
The fight never stops…the battle never ceases. Every day I wake up and I have to be prepared to conquer, to overcome. Whether it be a fight within me or fighting ignorance and stigmas from the outside world. I fight an inner dialog about how I’m a failure, that I’m not good enough, that I’m... Continue Reading →
Words… We use them every day, in one way or another. They can be beautiful and heartfelt, or they can be debilitating and cruel. They have different definitions, are spoken in different languages, mean different things to different people. Words have become such a big part of who I am today and how I express... Continue Reading →
Today my anxiety manifested as anger. I’m having a bad brain day. I want today to be over and tomorrow to be here. I’m annoyed, frustrated, angry, anxious, and confused. I want to scream; I want to yell. I want to cry until there are no tears left. I’m angry at my anxiety which also... Continue Reading →
Here I am, day eighty-something of this pandemic. I have no idea where the time has gone and how it is now June. I am writing this with an abundance of different emotions; happy, sad, grief, disappointment, love…etc. It’s been such a roller coaster ride. One, that I would love to get off right now.... Continue Reading →
I’ve been scrambling around the house for an hour and a half…doing laundry, cleaning up, trying to organize things. Because when my anxiety is getting bad, out of control, high, loud, unbearable…whatever the heck you want to call it, I have coping mechanisms. I clean the bathroom, I do laundry, I refold towels in the... Continue Reading →
I’m the type of person who feels A LOT. I’m an emotional person, wear my heart on my sleeve, cry at sappy movies and TV shows, what I’m trying to say is that it doesn’t take much to make me tear up. I’ve been called soft, asked to just get over it, told to push... Continue Reading →
I wish there was a switch or an on/off button or an intensity dial. Because today I’d hit that switch, push that on/off button and turn the dial all the way down. Words seem to come easy to me. I remember in high school having random thoughts, feelings and sayings scribbled throughout my student planner.... Continue Reading →
I’m in uncharted waters with no map to guide me. Facing an unknown storm with no end in sight. I didn’t think feeling this much anxiety was possible. But it’s there every morning I wake up and every night when I go to bed. Usually I can deal with it and get a break from... Continue Reading →
Today is going to be a day…I can already tell. My body is tense, my head feels cloudy, I’m waiting for the tears to fall. I want them to fall, I want to scream. Yet, I sit here feeling almost numb. Numb because my brain is trying to push away my anxious thoughts, to hide... Continue Reading →
Conquering Mind Madness 
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